Home Sweet Home

Home Sweet Home. I just got off the plane, about an hour ago for my quick weekend trip home to Milwaukee. I was only back at school for four weeks, and those four weeks, a lot of new beginnings occurred. I talked to my Mom a lot, and my Grandma and realized I just needed to take a breath and leave Tampa behind for the weekend. I missed my Grandma a ton even though it was only four weeks. right when I got home I ran across the street, and gave her a big hug, she had been waiting up for me. My grandma is my best friend. Since I was a little girl I have always been extremely close with her. I always tell her she is going to be my maid of honor in my wedding. I have tons of girlfriends that I consider my best friends, but my grandma is the one person in my life, I can count on to be there for me no matter what. She is my shoulder to cry on, my escape from reality many times, and the one that I can have so much fun with. I love her to death. She is the one thing that keeps me coming back to Milwaukee, when time and time again I say that I'm not coming back to this place. I am very close with my parents as well. Me and my Mom are a lot alike. She is very hardworking and determined. Tonight when I walked in the house I had a feeling. I always have a feeling or this same rush of thoughts that come in my head when I come home. I look at the gorgeous house my parents provide. It amazes me, neither of them went to college, they both just worked there way up to achieve success. It scares me to think about the future sometimes. I feel that If I am not able to provide the tyoe of lifestyle they have given me for my children, that I am a failure. Scary. It is good to see my Dad when I get home, well kind of see him... He was asleep, seeing that he gets of at 3 30 everyday to go to work. I admire him so much for this. He works long days sometimes 15 hours its insane. His job is extremely stressful, and its frusterating and hurtful to me how he deals with the stress sometimes, making me never want to come back to this place. I am learning though to separate myself from his problems and my life. I learn to love him for the father he is to me. I love him so much, he does everything he possible can for me and my brother. I just wish that I could open up to him and tell him how I feel, but I can't. maybe someday God will give me the strength to do that. But for now I am going to enjoy the weekend here in the freezing cold, and enjoy time with the family. I hope my brother comes home from school so I can see him !